A reader struggles with whether it is disloyal to maintain a friendship with her friend’s enemy.
I tend to distance myself from people who befriend people who have betrayed me. To me that’s not loyalty. I will keep it cordial, but I will not trust the person who befriends someone knowing what they did.
This is such a great question. I wish it had a simple answer. I think you provided some context in which to think through the possibilities, including the #1 consideration, what exactly is the nature of the rift? Is it disloyal to be friends with someone stole your friend's boyfriend in high school? Not at all. Is it disloyal to be friends with someone who attacked your friend physically? Yes, definitely. The black and white choices are easy -- it's the gray ones I wonder about.