As the ties between two long-term friends become more tenuous, a woman wonders whether the friendship is worth saving.
I don't know. I sense a one-sided relationship, and it's not the one "Disappointed Friend" thinks it is. She mentions her friend has not reached out as often, hasn't sent as many cards and gifts, hasn't rearranged her schedule to accommodate Disappointed's desired time to visit -- has Disappointed sent as many cards and gifts, called, written, offered to host a visit? Or has Disappointed assumed her friend's life is perfect, others do everything for her, and therefore the friend should always be the giver? Putting myself in the Florida friend's shoes, my guess is, she feels she has gone above and beyond, with very little reciprocity.
Sounds like a difficult time. After I lost my dad, my best friend was initially there for me, but since then, I hardly hear from her, and she has not asked how I am doing. She did move out of state a couple of months before my dad passed. What my grief counselor told me is I don’t necessarily have to end the friendship, but to put those friendships on a shelf and get back to them if I feel inclined too. Maybe step away from your friend for now, deal with your current situation and see if you want to resume with the friendship. Situations definitely force one to find out who shows up and who does not.